


Treat Mothman With Kindness

by flowercrownfemme



Category: Mothman (Folklore), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Also Dead Rats?, And Accidental Theft, Cryptid Harry, Cryptozoologist Louis, Even I Don't Know Anymore, Feminine Harry, Fluff, Halloween, Harry Has Wings And Louis Loves Him, Harry Likes Lamps, Kiwi Video, Lesbian Cat Weddings, Lots of glitter, M/M, Mothman Harry, PTA Mom Simon Cowell, Really Weird Fluff, Small Towns, Spooky Boyz Cryptid Hunters, Spooky Glitter, is this a crack fic?, like two seconds of angst, spooky stuff, stranger danger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 06:06:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16402718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowercrownfemme/pseuds/flowercrownfemme
Summary: “Does anyone else ever think mothman is... Kinda hot?”“No?” Zayn squinted, frowning. “Louis? The fuck?”In which Louis, Liam, Niall and Zayn are amateur cryptozoologists and Harry is the creature they find in the woods of a small north-western town.ft. lots of glitter and shrieking and a whole shed full of lesbian cats.





	Treat Mothman With Kindness

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote it! Finally! I've been wanting to write this for months but had to put it off and then I basically did a speed write to get it done before Halloween so it's not perfect and it's only lightly edited but it's also completely ridiculous so I don't think a few spelling mistakes will make too much of a difference.  
> Special thanks to Noa and Liliana for helping me come up with the idea, especially Liliana who sat with me for hours at a time yelling about PTA mom Simon Cowell and Betunia, and to Phoenix who had an actual answer every time I asked her where she would take mothman on a date or how to spell out an inhuman sheik.  
> Enjoy!  
> Chloe <3

**** There had been reports going back years, rumors that stacked up and added to each other until there were multiple reported sightings every week and reported incidents almost every day. It was nothing new, strange phenomena and unexplainable events were just a part of Louis’ life, but the incidents reported made even _ his _ brow furrow. Stolen clothes, missing cats and children who disappeared for hours at a time only to come back covered in cake and raving about the man in the woods. Drivers deported a man-sized creature standing in the middle of the street at night and staring them down until they drove off the road. Someone had taken a grainy video of something bigger than any bird soaring through the night sky.

The small town of Bleakburn had a cryptid on their hands and Louis was the only man who could help them.

Well, him and his team.

_ Spooky Boyz Cryptid Hunters _ consisted of Zayn Malik: head of tech, Liam Payne: the skeptic in charge of research, Niall Horan: head of snacks, and Louis Tomlinson: the believer. They’d created their YouTube channel in university, posting small documentaries about every cryptid they could find, interviewing eyewitnesses and eventually going searching for proof of their own. The most solid proof they’d gotten was some now-plaster-cased Sasquatch tracks and a tuft of fur that Louis swore came from a chupacabra. Even so, their videos has gotten popular enough for them to use them as a full time job and to fund their trips around the U.S. as they searched for new creatures in new towns.

Bleakburn was the first town to contact them directly, which seemed to show just how desperate they were for help.

When they arrived in the tiny, gloomy northwestern town they were greeted by the chief of police, a kind but frazzled woman named Sgt. Teasdale, and an older, gruff sort of man with a very botoxed face.

“Thank you for coming, boys,” the sergeant said when they climbed out of their beat-up rain soaked van. “You have to know that this is our last resort. I’ve had every person on my force trying to protect our town but we just don’t have the manpower to deal with this, or any experience with this sort of thing.”

“Of course, ma’am,” Liam nodded seriously, shaking her hand. “We’ll be doing anything we can to help you with this situation. We’re professionals.”

The man beside her rolled his eyes and stepped forward.

“I’m sure you will,” he simpered disdainfully. “I don’t know what Lou here has told you but we want this creature gone. Dead, preferably. We can’t have something like that running loose in our town. There are  _ children _ here.”

“Of course,” Louis said, his eyes narrowed. “And who are you?”

“This is Simon Cowell,” Sgt. Teasdale told them with a strange sort of reverence, “head of the PTA.”

“That’s nice,” Liam said with an easy smile. “How old are your kids?”

“I’ve only got one child,” Simon sneared. “My precious Betunia.”

“Odd name for a kid,” Niall commented brightly. “But I like it. Very unique.”

“Betunia isn’t a human,” Simon snarled. “She’s a Persian Longhair. She’s won prizes for her beauty.”

“Alright,” Niall said, his smile not faltering. “Cats are cool.”

“Well there aren’t many left in town,” Simon told them, his eyes burning darkly. “Not with that  _ thing _ on the loose. It’s been taking cats,  _ eating _ them. Nearly all that cats in town have been stolen and I won’t have that happening to my Betunia. She’s a  _ purebred _ . I would  _ sue _ .”

“We'll be sure to keep Petunia safe,” Louis said.

“ _ Buh- _ tunia,” Simon corrected hauntily.

“Alright,” Niall nodded. 

“Do you think we could interview some of the people who have seen the creature?” Liam asked. 

“Of course,” Lou nodded. “Many of the folks in town were very hesitant to let a group of people like you into our town but I've made a list for you of folks who have made reports and who have agreed to speak with you.”

“Thank you, ma'am,” Liam said, taking the list from her and dipping his chin. “This will make our job much easier.”

“Make sure you catch this thing soon,” Simon warned them. “If it's after cats then it's only a matter of time before it's got my precious Betunia. She's the best one in town.”

 

With the help of Sgt. Teasdale's list they went from door to door interviewing various citizens of the town, meeting with the owner of Corden’s, the local diner, the two girls who took the video of the creature flying at night, and various members of the PTA - all of whom felt very strongly that the creature must be stopped.

 

“It’s been bad for business,” Mr. Corden told them in one of his plastic booths. “It stands in that intersection right there for hours on end sometimes and it drives people away. As soon as the sun goes down nobody wants to come near here anymore. Nighttime used to be almost half our business with truck drivers and teenagers and late diners but now it’s like the whole town has an unofficial curfew of 6pm. Plus it leaves all this sooty black stuff in the street that I’ve got to clean up.”

 

“It’s freaky,” Perrie told them when they went to ask about her video. “We were out at makeout point and then we see these, like,  _ glowing _ eyes - ”

“Like a cat,” Jade nodded, their hands intertwined between them.

“Yeah,” Perrie agreed. “Like cat eyes. It was, like, standing in the bushes, like,  _ watching _ us. So I yelled at it to stop perving and then it took off but I had my phone so I took the vid of it flying away.”

“Freaky,” Jade said.

“ _ So _ freaky.”

“Did you get a good look at it?” Liam asked, glancing back at Louis behind the camera. “Could you describe its size? Shape?”

“It was big,” Perrie told them. “Probably, like, seven feet tall. Maybe eight. Huge. Looked like a guy but, like, creepy. Big glowing eyes. Then when it started flying it had these huge wings.”

“Like bird wings?”

“No,” Perrie shook her head. “Like, buggy. Thin. But  _ big _ . Like one of those, uh, what’s it called? The goth butterflies. The icky ones.”

“Moths?” Louis supplied.

“Yeah,” she nodded. “Like one of those. And in the morning my car had all this black dust on one door.”

 

“I want that thing gone,” Mrs. Martin told them when they went to visit her. “I don’t want it anywhere near my children. I’ll  _ move _ , if I have to.”

“So your children have spent time with the creature?” Liam asked, jotting down notes. “Do you think we could ask them a few questions?”

“ _ No _ ,” she said, looking horrified by the prospect. “That thing, it  _ did _ something to them out there. Messed with their heads. Convinced them it wasn’t bad.  _ Brainwashed _ them.”

Louis and Zayn extranged a look behind the cameras.

“So, uh, what exactly happened, Mrs. Martin?” Liam asked.

“It kidnapped them, my poor babies, and drug them out to the woods while they were walking home from school. Then,  _ hours _ and  _ hours _ later, when it was practically  _ sundown _ they came stumbling back home, weak and tired and  _ traumatised _ and completely  _ covered _ in  _ pink frosting _ .”

“Frosting?” Liam asked, furrowing his brows and glancing back at the team.

“ _ Pink _ frosting,” Mrs. Martin nodded. “Absolutely dis _ grace _ ful. Pink frosting and black soot. It took  _ hours _ to get them washed up.”

 

“It ruined my shoes,” Mr. Stoll told them, straightening his tie indignantly. “Brand new leather loafers, completely drenched.”

“So it,” Liam winced, trying to understand, “it threw water on your shoes?”

“All over them,” he nodded. “It does it all the time. Random sprays of water coming from the sky.”

“Freak weather patterns?” Liam asked, starting to jot that down in his notes.

“No,” Mr. Stoll shook his head. “It’s not the weather. It’s that thing doing it. Anything it can do to ruin somebody’s day. It’s  _ evil _ .”

 

“It’s a menace,” Mrs. Peters told them when they’d sat down in her parlor. “It’s been terrorising this town for too long. It’s been stealing my blouses for nearly a year now so I’ve gotten good about bringing everything in extra early but it came through two days ago when I forgot to bring the wash in and it stole every last thing on the line! And then it threw rocks all over my garden!”

“Are the rocks still there?” Niall asked, perking up.

“Yes,” she nodded, as if just talking about it was some arduous thing. “I haven’t been in the backyard since because it left this horrible smell.”

“Do you think there could be scat?” Liam asked, much too eager for the subject matter.

“I don’t know,” Mrs. Peters sighed, holding a hand to her forehead and teetering where she stood. “Maybe. To me it smelled more like something rotting.”

“We’ll investigate that for you, ma’am,” Louis told her, leading her back to her seat with a reassuring hand on her elbow. “We’ll let you know what we find.”

“Alright,” she said wearily. “Do you think you can get rid of the smell?”

“We can surely try,” Louis nodded, ever the boyscout.

“Oh, and it stole Old Lady Mabel’s good silver last month. Try and get that back if you can.”

 

“So what are you thinking?” Zayn asked Louis while they scoured the Peters’ yard for clues.

“I don’t know,” Louis shrugged, holding up one of the smooth shiny stones they’d found in the flowerbed and studying it. “It seems different from anything we’ve investigated before. Those were all weird but they felt pretty standard. This thing, the frosting...?”

“Not as standard,” Zayn agreed. “Do you think it could just be a person? Some prankster who’s just messing with people?”

“What, like in Warlington?”

“Yeah,” Zayn nodded. “This feels closer to that. All the randomness.”

“But what about the flying?”

“Drones?” Zayn shrugged. “I don’t know. I think we need to investigate some more.”

Suddenly they heard a high pitched scream coming from the side of the house.

They both took off, sprinting across the yard and following the continuous scream until they found Niall standing with his mouth hung open and his eyes wide.

“What is it?” Louis asked, running to his side.

Niall continued to scream.

“Are you okay?” Zayn asked, grabbing his arm.

“Niall?” Liam said, approaching him slowly.

Niall only pointed to his feet where there lay a crumpled up tattered bag, like one of the large floral purses that Louis’ great-grandmother used to carry around. There was a dark sooty sort of dust covering it and when Liam nudged it open they all stepped back.

“Oh, fuck,” Zayn grunted, holding a hand over his nose. “What the fuck?”

“Are those - ?” Louis asked, peering into the top of the bag.

“Rats,” Liam nodded, picking up a stick to poke it with.

“Well, at least we found the source of the smell.”

“Jesus fuck,” Niall said weakly, having finally stopped screaming and now looking rather faint.

“Who carries around a carpet bag full of rats?” Zayn asked, frowning.

“Looks like our cryptid does,” Louis said, pointing to the soot built up around the rats. “You think they’re snacks for on-the-go?”

“Louis,” Zayn glared. “That’s sick.”

“It’s probably running out of cats,” Louis mused. “Needs to look for other food sources.”

“I think I’m gonna puke,” Niall said, looking paler than usual.

“Louis, stop scaring Niall,” Liam reprimanded, still poking at the bag of rats. “It must be some sort of food source though. See? It snapped all the necks. It must be eating them.”

“Why the carpet bag?” Louis asked, crouching down for a better look.

“Why any of this?” Liam shrugged. “This thing we’re dealing with... I don’t think it’s the normal sort of eat-some-goats, scare-some-hikers type of creature. This one’s weird. It’s got, like, habits. Preferences.”

“Got a picky eater on our hands?” Louis asked wryly.

“Maybe.”

 

That evening they set up a camp in the woods, hoping to see something themselves. As the sun set behind the trees they circled up around the small fire they’d built and compared notes, Zayn holding a camera to record them all.

“Alright, so what do we know so far?” Louis asked, squinting at his scribbled-on notepad.

“It’s fucking weird,” Niall snorted.

“It seems curious about people,” Liam said, turning the pages in his notebook. “It doesn’t just stay in the woods. It’s seems to enter the town almost routinely. Maybe we can work out a schedule of what it does each night and track it like that. But it seems to live in the woods. Or this is its home base. This is where it took the kids and it seems like most of the sightings have been bordering the woods.”

“It doesn’t seem malicious,” Louis mused. “It didn’t hurt the kids, if you believe what they’ve said about it. And it hasn’t attacked anyone. Maybe it’s just been getting bored? Looking for a little chaos?”

“Trickster demon?” Zayn asked from behind the camera.

“Could be,” Louis shrugged. “But that might be a little bit above our paygrade. Let’s hope for something a little smaller. Something playful. And cute. Like an ogopogo. Those sound cute right? I bet they’re cute.”

They spent the night hiking through the woods, tripping over tree roots and shrubs and following every ping on Zayn's EVP reader.

“I don't think there's anything out here,” Zayn told them when it was nearing dawn. “Or if there is it must be smart enough to stay hidden.”

“The sun's coming up and we haven't seen anything,” Liam agreed, his usually stick-straight posture turning slumped and defeated. 

“What about the eyes I saw earlier?” Louis asked. “That was something. Or that shriek I heard around midnight?”

“It was probably just a coyote,” Zayn shrugged. “Their eyes can glow like that.”

“But I saw that footprint!” Niall said, catching his foot on a snarled root and nearly braining himself on a tree as he ran to catch up.

“That was probably from a hiker,” Zayn told him. 

“But it was  _ heeled!” _ he insisted. “That's weird right? Nobody hikes in heels.”

“I don't know,” Liam frowned. “It's definitely strange but is it cryptid-strange or is it recluse-drag-queen-who-lives-in-the-woods-strange?”

“Why not both?” Louis snorted.

There was a far-off honking sound like a goose from off in the trees and Louis felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickling.

By the time they'd hiked back to their camp they were all exhausted, feeling defeated by a long night and a full SD card in every camera with no solid evidence found. They almost didn't notice the light dusting of soot that was smudged over their tent and the area around it. 

“What the fuck?” Niall said, running forward and swiping his finger through the dust.

“That wasn't there when we left,” Liam said, stating the obvious. 

“Of fucking course it wasn't,” Niall told him. “Our fucking cryptid put it there!”

“We don't know that,” Zayn said, ever the level-headed one. “It's just dirt. The wind might have blown it up.”

“This is not  _ dirt _ ,” Niall argued, rubbing his fingers together and feeling the soot between them. “It's soft. It's, like, powdery. It doesn't feel like dirt.”

“So it's ash,” Zayn shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s six a.m. and we didn’t see the creature all night. Maybe it likes poking tents. Maybe there was a freak dust storm. I don’t care. I’m going to bed.”

He threw back the tent flap and burrowed into his sleeping bag, ignoring the thin layer of soot dusting the inside of the tent as well.

“Fine,” Niall grumbled, crawling in after him and collapsing onto his own bed roll. Liam went in after him, all three of them seeming to fall asleep as soon as they laid down. Louis knelt down on his sleeping bag, noting that it seemed coated in at least twice as much of the black dust as the others, the soot saturated on his pillow and his backpack. He ran his fingers through it, feeling the strange silkiness that Niall had described, and held it up to the thin beam of sunlight shining through the gap in the tent flap.

“What the fuck?” he muttered, frowning.

He twisted his hand back and forth, watching as the black soot seemed to glimmer when it hit the light like a finely milled glitter.

Everything about their cryptid seemed to get stranger as the minutes passed.

 

“I’m staying out here all night if I have to,” Louis said resolutely, patting the top of Zayn’s latest spook-detecting machine as if it were a loyal dog.

“Are you sure?” Liam asked, looking pained. “You know I’d join you but...”

They’d been in the town for almost a week and they had nothing but a few strange sounds and a bucket’s worth of black shimmery soot to show for it. They were all losing hope, afraid that whatever had been running amuck in the town knew they were there and was avoiding them. Or messing with them. Either way they didn’t think they were going to see anything it didn’t want them to.

“I’ll be fine,” Louis promised. “I’ve got Zayn’s fancy doo-dad and look! I’ve got snacks!”

He held up a jar of peanut butter and a pair of browning bananas.

“I’m set for life.”

“Umm, alright,” Liam said, eyeing him wearily.

“Goodnight Louis!” Niall called, poking his head out of the tent with a wide grin. “Let us know if you see anything spooky! But. Like. Not right away. Don’t wake me up. I love you, but. I’d like to actually sleep for a full night.”

“Will do,” Louis saluted. 

“‘Kay, see you in the morning!” Niall waved. “Don’t wake me up!”

Liam and Zayn both gave him their own versions of the same sentiment, eager for a break from their near-constant patrolling and interviewing and research. It might have felt worth it if they’d been able to find anything new but they hadn’t so spirits seemed at an all time low.

Louis settled in with his legs crossed and his bananas on the ground beside him, opening up his peanut butter and dipping in with a plastic fork. He passed the time watching the occasional soft blips register on the Spook-O-Meter next to him and smacking his lips to feel the peanut butter stick to the roof of his mouth. As the jar slowly emptied and the moon rose higher above him his eyes grew heavy. He shifted around, changing positions every few minutes as his feet and then his legs fell asleep until he was slumped over with his arms wrapped around Zayn’s machine and his head rested on the top.

There was a slight breeze flowing through the trees that tugged at his hair and made him blink his eyes even more.

The wind kicked up with a soothing sort of a flapping sound from overhead that slowed his breathing and made his eyelids seem to stick together. The machine he’d wrapped himself around was beeping but the sound was soft and musical when coupled with all the other sounds around him and it only made his head feel heavier. He nuzzled his head against the metal, feeling the breeze caressing his face and letting it lull him to sleep.

 

_ Louis was walking through the forest, tripping over dead leaves and uneven ground and scraping his forearms on jagged bark, watching the blood bead up from each scratch without feeling a thing. He frowned at that, briefly wondering why the scrapes didn’t hurt before something tugged him forward. Something was holding his hand and he knew that their hand was big and warm and soft and it was covered in a thin silky powder like the kind Lottie always tried to dust on his face when she said it got shiny. _

_ With their hands tied together he wasn’t stumbling anymore, seeming to glide over the moss and twigs and branches without ever touching the ground. Louis looked up to see who it was that was holding his hand but his eyes wouldn’t focus on them. _

_ He could hear them humming though, and he recognized the song even though he couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard it awake. It had been featured in every dream he’d had since they’d arrived in Bleakburn. _

_ Shania Twain’s “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” _

_ Louis started to hum along, watching the ground fly by beneath them like when he was little and he’d stand with his feet in the ocean watching the tide rush back out to sea. _

 

**“** **_Duh duh duh-duh duh-DUH DUH!_ ** **”**

 

Louis woke up with a start, the tune tearing him out of his dream. His eyes flew open and he recoiled back with a gasp.

There was someone leaning over him, their face only inches from his own. Their noses would probably touch if Louis moved even a fraction of an inch forward. He jerked his head back. With a bit of space between them he could see the boy in front of him, his big round eyes and dark pink lips, parted as if in wonder. Louis frowned, wondering what something so pretty could be doing out here so late at night and if he might still be dreaming. He wanted to reach up, to push the loose tangled curls that had fallen over the boy’s face behind his ears and maybe to kiss him, if it truly was still a dream.

Then the boy dropped his jaw and let out a horrible eagle-like screech that made Louis’ ears ring.

“Jesus  _ fuck! _ ” Louis screamed, scrambling back in the dirt.

The thing followed him, seeming to hover over him as Louis crab-walked on tight, shaking limbs. Zayn’s spook-detector was going crazy, the lights flashing and a frantic whirring sounding from inside it. When the lights flashed on them they reflected back in the eyes of the creature above him, making them glow bright and yellow and big as saucers.

“Lou, would you shut up?” came a low grumbly voice from inside the tent.

The thing glanced after it, a deep pout pulling at its face before it dipped forward, pressing a quick peck of a kiss on the tip of Louis’ nose before letting out another inhuman shriek and disappearing into the night with a flap of its enormous wings.

“Holy fucking shit,” Louis breathed, clutching his chest and falling back into the dirt. “Holy fucking  _ shit _ .”

He lay there for a long time, until his pulse wasn’t pounding out a staccato rhythm in his head and he could take a breath without it getting caught at the back of his throat.

Once he could sit up without feeling completely faint he made a quick assessment of his surroundings. The Spook-O-Meter had calmed down, letting out only a few disgruntled hums and beeps. Louis himself was covered in black soot and there was a pair of banana peels laid out carefully where he had been sleeping.

“That the  _ fuck _ ,” he groaned dragging himself back into the tent and burrowing into his sleeping bag, too tired and too frightened to handle anything more. He wriggled around in his sleeping bag until he was pressed up against Liam, calming himself with the bigger lad’s deep slow breaths and the warmth he gave off through their blankets. Louis wrapped his arms around himself for extra comfort and tucked his head under Liam’s shoulder, falling back into a deep sleep.

 

“I know what I saw,” Louis insisted the next morning, angrily stabbing his fork into his fry up. “It wasn’t human.”

Zayn and Liam exchanged a glance on their side of the booth.

“You saw a monster,” Liam began slowly, “with curly hair - ”

“ - and reflective eyes,” Zayn added.

“ - that likes bananas - ”

“ - and Shania Twain - ”

“ - and it kissed you on the nose?” Zayn finished, both of them eying him wearily.

“Are you sure it wasn’t another weird dream?” Liam asked, frowning. “You said you’ve been having lots of those.”

“It wasn’t a dream,” Louis told them for what felt like the thousandth time. “I think it might be connected to the dreams, like causing them or something, because I think it’s been in my dreams. But I was awake. I’m sure of it. This morning I still had the black dust on my nose from where it kissed me.”

“I believe you, Lou,” Niall promised, reaching over his plate to steal his toast. “I heard you scream last night.”

“Why didn’t you fucking come help me?” Louis scowled.

“I was sleeping,” Niall said matter-of-factly, biting into the toast with a loud crunch.

“So why is Louis the only one of us who’s seen it?” Zayn asked, leaning over his coffee conspiratorially. “It’s been avoiding us all week and then suddenly it just crawls right on top of Louis? That doesn’t sound like our cryptid.”

“Maybe he likes you,” Niall smiled, batting his eyelashes at Louis. “A cryptid with a crush.”

“It did kiss you,” Liam shrugged.

“It was probably marking me as prey,” Louis grumbled, burrowing back into the diner booth.

“Can I get you boys anything else?” James, the owner of the diner asked, interrupting Niall’s rousing rendition of “Louis and Mothman Sitting in a Tree (K-I-S-S-I-N-G).”

“I think we’ll just take the check,” Liam told him, unsubtly kicking at Niall’s leg under the table.

 

That night Louis was determined to see the creature again, to get proof of its existence.

He hiked out a little ways from the tent with an entire bunch of bananas and a “Shania Twain’s Greatest Hits” CD that he’d bought in town to try and lure it out. He set both things in the middle of a small clearing he’d found, along with Zayn’s nicest shirt and a spritz of his own cologne and ducked down behind a bush with one of their smaller cameras. While he waited he went back over the notes in his notebook, tilting it up towards the moon to make out the words he’d written.

That day they’d interviewed more members of the PTA whose cats had been stolen. They were all positive that they’d been eaten and that it was the cryptid in the woods who was to blame. They’d sat and listened while each person told them about how the creature had ransacked their yards and attacked their children and gobbled up their family pets.

Louis felt a chill run up his spine, wondering if he was the next in line for the creature’s dinner.

Then he noticed the eyes in the tree line across from him.

They were glowing, two yellow-green orbs peering out from the shadows between the trees. Louis grabbed his camera, silently cursing when it wouldn’t turn on.

There was a rustling of leaves and snapping twigs as the thing moved closer.

Louis watched with wide eyes as it emerged from the darkness, stepping into the moonlight and stepping cautiously towards the bait in the clearing.

It looked like a boy, which made Louis falter. Without the light reflecting in its eyes it could almost be human, ignoring the folded wings on its back. It was tall - taller than Louis for sure - even hunched over as it was, its long dark hair hanging in wavy tendrils over its face. He watched as it knelt down, smelling the air around the bait curiously before breaking into a wide grin, hugging each item to its chest.

“You brought me gifts!”

The deep gravelly voice made Louis gasp, jerking enough to make the shrubbery around him rustle.

He looked up to see the creatures eyes staring straight back at him, its expression cheerful.

“I - What?” Louis stuttered, heart beating wildly in his chest.

The creature crawled forward, skittering across the forest floor until it was crouched just in front of the shrub.

“Why are you in there?” it asked, still cradling the shirt and the fruit and the CD in one arm. “Were you going to sleep in there? I like sleeping in shrubs sometimes but you’ve got to be careful because sometimes they have thorns.”

“Gotta watch out for thorns,” Louis replied absently, his mind blank.

It nodded back sagely.

“You - ” Louis started, twisting up his face. “You can talk. Christ.”

“Of course I can talk,” the creature grinned, as if Louis was being incredibly silly. “Nearly everyone can.”

“But, you kept shrieking before. Nobody- We assumed you only shrieked.”

“So were you,” it pointed out. “You yell all the time. Everyone does. It’s fun. See?”

It opened its mouth wide and let out a startlingly high-pitched screech.

It stuck its hand through the leaves and grabbed Louis’, pulling him up and making him hurtle over the bush so as not to trip over it. Then they were standing in the clearing, nearly chest-to-chest as the thing looked expectantly into his eyes.

“Thank you for the gifts.”

“Erm, yes,” Louis nodded. “The gifts.”

“They’re very nice. I never get gifts.”

“That’s a shame,” Louis said, feeling a bit like he might be losing his mind. “So, em. It’s you, yeah? Who’s been... Going into town.”

“Lots of people go into town.”

“Yes but you’re... Not from there. Are you?”

“No...” the boy shook his head, pinching his lip between two fingers. “Not really.”

“Right,” Louis nodded again. “So you’re... You’re here.”

“I am.”

“Right,” Louis nodded, taking a step back and shaking his head as if to clear it. “Right, right, right. Em. Well. Hello then.”

“Hello,” the creature grinned, waving one hand enthusiastically.

Louis took a moment to really look at it, lowering his eyes from the thing’s big green eyes to the frill-covered old woman’s blouse and the giant flowing zoot-suit pants, down to the dusty black heeled boots on its feet. Did it even  _ have _ feet? Should Louis ask? That seemed like a rude thing to ask.

What if it had hooves?

“I’m Harry!”

When Louis only frowned in response it continued.

“You’re supposed to tell me  _ your _ name now. I think. Right?”

“Yes,” Louis nodded, his mouth twitching. “Of course. Of course, uh, Harry. My name is Louis.”

“Oh, this is fun!” the creature - Harry - declared, a dimple popping up on its left cheek. “I never get to talk to humans and you’re already my favorite one! Will you stay here forever?”

“Erm, no,” Louis said, pursing his lips. “Not forever. For a while though.”

“Oh. Poo,” Harry frowned, his shoulders slumping. Then his smile went bright again and his wings fluttered out behind him. “We can still have fun while you’re here though!”

“Sure,” Louis nodded. “Yeah. Whatever you want.”

“Ooh, well we could go to the big light or we could roll in the dirt or we could go to the field or we could go to the dump or we could - ”

“What do you usually do?” Louis asked. “Do you think you could take me on, like, your normal night? Just do whatever you’d be doing if I weren’t here.”

“Well that’s boring,” Harry said. “But alright. Could we do fun things later?”

“Sure,” Louis told him. “Later.”

“Alright,” Harry agreed, rather petulantly. “Well, first I’d usually go check on the girls and see if they need anything.”

“The girls?”

“C’mon, I haven’t checked on them since last night. They’re probably getting restless.”

Harry took off, seeming to glide over the forest floor and leaving Louis to jog behind him to keep up.

As they approached a large, deteriorating shed Louis’ frown deepened.

“Is this where the girls are?” he asked, fear growing in his chest as he imagined the pile of young girls that must be hidden in this shed. He could hear a soft crying sound from inside and as they got closer there was a light scratching at the wooden door, as if someone were clawing at it with their nails in desperation. He slowed his gait, his breathing getting fast and choppy as dread curled within him. 

“Yes,” Harry smiled lightly, bouncing forward to undo the latch on the door. “I hope they aren’t angry with me, I should have come earlier.”

He pulled the door open and Louis braced himself for starving girls and rotting flesh.

Instead he saw a small orange tabby cat.

It ran towards Harry and pawed at his knee, mewing impatiently.

“I’m so sorry, Mrs. Pumpkin,” he said, bending down to scoop her up with the arm not holding his gifts. “I know I’m terribly late.”

As Harry spoke more cats emerged from the shed, all circling around him in greeting.

Louis watched in awe as Harry sprawled out flat on the forest floor and two dozen cats all climbed over him, curling up on his chest and licking his chin and batting at the ruffles on his shirt. He giggled whenever they headbutted his stomache or started kneeding his legs or biting his ear, shaking the sleeping kitten on his chest and competing with the growing sounds of purring.

“So these are the girls?” Louis asked, kneeling down to pet the scraggly gray cat that was sniffing curiously at his shoe.

“Yes,” Harry grinned. “Aren’t they beautiful? My lovely ladies.”

“They’re great,” Louis nodded, scratching the gray cat behind the ears. “Are they all girls then?”

“Yes,” Harry nodded. “I think it’s important to give them a safe space away from all the men in their lives.”

“Very noble of you.”

“Thank you.”

“So where did they come from then?”

Louis settled down, crossing his legs as the gray cat and a sleek black cat both crawled onto his lap.

“Oh, I rescued them,” Harry told him. “They were all living in town and they were completely miserable. Some of them didn’t have any homes at all and some of them ran away from home. I told them that I’d give them a home if they wanted a new one so they came with me. At first some of them had a hard time adjusting, after everything they’d  _ been through _ , so some of them were turning to self-destructive ways and I had to step in. Now though, they’re all so much happier than they used to be. And I’m so glad that so many of them have even found love. Mrs. Pumpkin and Mrs. Parsnip here, they’ve been married for almost a year now and they still act like a couple of young love birds. And I’m so happy that Patsy and Stevie found each other, even so late in life. It really makes you believe in love, doesn’t it?”

Louis looked around at the cats, at Mrs. Pumpkin who was balancing on Harry’s forehead and Mrs. Parsnip who was chewing on the leg of his trousers, at Patsy who was using Zayn’s shirt as a cushion in the dirt and Stevie who was grooming herself methodically near Harry’s knee. He didn’t see any of the love connections that Harry apparently had.

“Er, yeah. So they... Talk to you?”

“No, of course not,” Harry said, his tone serious and his face straight. “That would be silly. I’m very good at reading body language.”

Louis couldn’t tell if he was fucking with him or not.

“And the ceremonies were so beautiful,” Harry said, his eyes going dreamy again, grabbing a scrawny hairless cat from his abdomen and lifting her straight up over his head, her body limp as she let out an indignant meow. “Cher here is set to marry Sparkle in less than a week. I hope she’s not getting cold feet. But they’re so in love. I think she’s just excited to celebrate their relationship, you know?”

“I’m sure,” Louis agreed, watching as Cher struggled to get down before licking Harry’s nose and batting her paw at Mrs. Pumpkin on his head. “I’d be ecstatic if I was her.”

“Miss Mercury is gonna be her bridesmaid, but I don’t think Sparkle has chosen hers yet.”

“She’d better get on that,” Louis said, letting a fluffy calico cat join the others on his lap. The black cat on his knee shifted over and started grooming the calico’s ears.

“Look at that!” Harry exclaimed, sitting up and jostling the dozen or so cats that had been sleeping on him. “I think Sparkle may have chosen after all.”

He leaned forward to watch the cats in Louis’ lap, his eyes bright.

“I think Gucci may have just been granted the honor of bridesmaid,” he said, reaching over the give the calico a congratulatory pet. “We’d better get her in a dress fitting soon or there won’t be enough time.”

“Of course,” Louis nodded, playing along. “But maybe she’d prefer a suit. I think she’d look lovely in one.”

Harry gasped.

“I’ve never made a suit before,” he said, eyes full of wonder. “Do you think she’d like one? She’d be quite dashing all suited up.”

“Quite the little charmer,” Louis agreed, keeping his face serious. “She’d look just  _ purr _ -fect.”

Harry’s eyes went wide before he broke into a loud honking laugh that made half the cats retreat back into their shed.

“ _ Purr _ -fect!” Harry repeated gleefully. “That’s  _ wonderful! _ ”

“You think so?” Louis asked, giggling. “I think it’ll be a beautiful  _ meow- _ aige.”

Harry let out another sharp barking laugh, his wings fluttering out behind him with a cloud of shimmery black dust.

“Umm,” he tried, scrunching up his face in concentration. “It’s like a fairy  _ tail. _ Like cat tail?”

“That’s good,” Louis nodded encouragingly. “I hope Cher is ready for Sparkle to  _ whisker  _ off her feet.”

“Her  _ paws _ ,” Harry corrected, his smile so wide it looked painful.

“Of course,” Louis agreed. He looked around and saw that all the cats had retreated to the shed. “So what else do you do at night? You check on your girls, and then what?”

“Umm, well then it kind of depends,” Harry said, standing up and brushing himself off. “Sometimes I forage, if I’m running low on food, usually I go into town because it’s more exciting there.”

“What do you do there?” Louis asked, following him as he tucked his new treasures away  for safekeeping and closed the door the the shed again, getting a quick glimpse of walls full of cat shelves and pink beds and sparkly toys.

“Depends,” Harry shrugged, starting to walk again. “Sometimes I don’t do anything and I just  _ look _ . There’s people in town and there aren’t any out here. It gets kind of lonely without people.”

He looked back at Louis, his eyes big and green and earnest and Louis felt his heart crack just a bit.

“I can imagine,” he said, even though he couldn’t really. He was constantly surrounded by three loud boys with no concept of personal space. He couldn’t remember the last time he really felt lonely. “So you’re the only... The only one who lives here?”

“Yeah. It’s just me and the girls.”

“Aren’t there- I mean aren’t there more of you? Somewhere? There has to be, right?”

“I don’t know,” Harry told him, hanging his head and dragging his feet as he walked. “I’ve been here for so long. I’ve never seen anyone else like me.”

“Oh,” Louis frowned, feeling his heart crack again. “I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay,” Harry said, a small tentative smile forming on his face. “I’m not lonely right now.”

Harry was looking at him so openly and hopefully that it absolutely broke his heart.

“That’s good, Harry,” he said, giving him a weak smile in return.

They walked in silence for a while, only stopping briefly while Harry retrieved a dirty pink tote bag from behind a bush. They circled back to town, exchanging the occasional question and answer about their daily (or nightly, in Harry’s case) lives. Harry was fascinating, his answers always strange and surprising and honest and his questions always startlingly sweet and earnest. Louis almost forgot that he wasn’t human until they came to the main streetlight in town and it reflected bright and green in his orb-like eyes.

“Is this your favorite place?” Louis asked, watching the light change and reflect back in Harry’s eyes.

“One of them,” Harry told him, his gaze fixed unwaveringly on the streetlight. “I like the way the light changes. It’s neat.”

“Very,” Louis nodded, smiling to himself as the light went red, bathing Harry in a rosey pink glow. He watched as the light cycled through every color, Harry’s eyes going wide with wonder at each change.

“Hey!” came a shout from behind them.

Louis whipped around to see James from the diner running out and brandishing a broom.

“I thought I told you to stay away from here!” he bellowed, shaking the broom towards Harry threateningly.

Harry let out a sound of surprize and cowered away, grabbing Louis’ hand and pulling him back into the shadows.

“Get out of here!” James yelled, his face red and angry.

Harry ran, tugging Louis along behind him as he went.

“C’mon,” Louis said, pulling him around a corner and out of sight.

Harry’s face was twisted in fear and sadness and he was breathing hard.

“Are you okay?” Louis asked, looking him over worriedly.

Harry nodded but wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“Does that happen a lot?”

Harry nodded again, his shoulders slumped in and his fingers knotted together.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Louis said, wrapping his fingers would Harry’s elbows and squeezing. “That’s really shitty. You weren’t doing anything wrong. I mean, you maybe shouldn’t stand in the middle of the street so much, but there was no one there. He shouldn’t have yelled like that either way.”

“It’s fine,” Harry husked, his face stained a deep embarrassed pink. “It happens all the time.”

“It shouldn’t though,” Louis told him, his older-brother instincts kicking in as he pulled Harry against his chest, wrapping his arms securely around him. “That sucks. It really fucking sucks.”

“It does,” Harry agreed quietly, nodding against Louis’ shoulder and melting into the embrace.

“So what else do you do on your  circuit ?” Louis asked once Harry had calmed down.

“I dunno,” Harry shrugged, obviously having lost his enthusiasm.

“C’mon,” Louis said, nudging his shoulder as they walked. “I’m good at running errands with people. I’m great at pretending to enjoy myself even when they’re boring. My sisters make me come shopping with them all the time and at first I would just pretend to be having a good time but now  _ I’m _ not even sure if I’m faking or not. I got so deep into character that I think I started actually enjoying it.”

Harry smiled a bit at that, just a small twitch of his lips that made Louis grin triumphantly.

“Whatever you want to do, really,” he promised. “Do you need to meet Bigfoot for tea? Maybe pop in to Cryptids-R-Us for some more wing powder?”

Harry was scrunching up his face to keep from laughing and Louis felt pride blooming warmly in his chest.

“No,” Harry shook his head. “I don’t have any plans. I usually just walk. Or fly. See what I can find.”

“A scavenger?” Louis asked wryly. 

“I guess,” Harry shrugged.

He started walking towards the neighborhoods and Louis followed, quickening his pace to keep up. They walked under street lamps and past picket fences, past brown grass and manicured lawns.

“Here,” Harry said, leading him through a break in the houses. 

He stepped through overgrown weeds and held back pruned rose bushes for Louis as they traipsed through yards of varying levels of kempedness. Louis tripped over some lawn ornaments in one yard and Harry caught him by the back of his hoodie, holding him up and hovering a few inches above the ground as he flew him to safety. Louis wobbled on his feet when he was set back in the grass, stumbling a few steps until Harry steadied him with a hand on his shoulder.

“Thanks,” Louis whispered.

He glanced back at Harry in the moonlight but the other boy was focused somewhere else, walking forward reverently.

“Louis,” he breathed, full of wonder. “Look!”

He rushed forward suddenly, running towards a clothesline full of fluttering white fabric, each piece draped like a Halloween sheet ghost. Louis watched as Harry touched each item, marveling at them as though he’d found a hidden treasure.

“Oh, they’re lovely,” he smiled, pleased as punch. “Aren’t they lovely?”

“So lovely,” Louis grinned, coming up beside him to see what he’d found.

“Look at this!” Harry exclaimed, unclipping what looked to be an old woman’s nightgown with a floor-length linen skirt and a pattern of small pink rosebuds. He twirled across the lawn, holding the dress to his chest as the long ruffled sleeves and loose skirt billowed out in front of him. “It’s just wonderful!”

“It’s great,” Louis agreed, smiling as he watched Harry’s improvised pseudo-ballet. His wings unfurled as he twirled, lifting him gracefully into the air until he was spinning ten feet over Louis’ head and giggling with delight.

“I  _ love _ it,” he declared, dropping back down to Earth and hugging the linen to his chest.

“Are you... Taking it?” Louis asked, remembering the reports of stolen clothes.

“Of course,” Harry said matter-of-factly. “I can’t just leave it here.”

“But - ” Louis started, not wanting to take away Harry’s newest obsession. “It probably belongs to someone.”

“That’s okay,” Harry told him, pulling the tote bag off his shoulder and reaching inside for a handful of shiny polished rocks. “I’ve got these.”

He gently laid them in a small pile below where the nightgown had been hanging and stood up with a satisfied smile.

“Oh,” Louis said, the rocks in Mrs. Peters’ yard suddenly making sense. “You’ve been leaving rocks. As payment.”

“Of course,” Harry nodded. “I wouldn’t take something without paying for it. That would be rude.”

“I think there might have been a bit of, er, miscommunication, Love,” Louis told him, wincing. “I’m not sure that everyone’s understood the rocks. I think they might have thought they were just... Rocks.”

“But they’re not just rocks,” Harry frowned, clutching his nightgown like a security blanket. “They’re the nicest ones I could find. I polished them myself. I thought they’d like them.”

“They’re very nice rocks,” Louis promised. “They’re lovely. The best rocks I’ve ever seen.”

“You like them?”

“Of course,” Louis told him. “I love them. I love your rocks. It’s just - The people in town. They usually use money to buy things. Like, paper money. Capitalism. Debit cards. Bank accounts. There usually aren’t rocks involved.”

“Why would they use paper?” Harry asked, puzzled. “That’s useless. It falls apart. Rocks are much nicer.”

“You’re completely right,” Louis nodded. “Rocks are so much better.”

“They are.”

Harry gathered up with new nightgown and marched out of the yard.

They waltzed through the town, Louis always running just behind Harry, white linen trailing behind them like a wake.

“That must be Simon’s house,” Louis mused as they passed a large Victorian style house with a white picket fence and a sign that read “Cowell” out front.

“Simon?” Harry asked, looking up at the house.

“The president of the PTA,” Louis explained dryly. “He hasn’t got any children though, so I’m not sure how he got the title. He’s just horrible. Really awful. And he seems to have a vendetta against you.”

“Me?” Harry asked, eyes wide.

“Don’t worry,” Louis told him. “I’ll - ”

He wanted to tell Harry that he would protect him, keep him safe, but wasn’t that just the opposite of why he’d come to the Bleakburn?

“I’ll figure something out. He’s just- He’s got a stick up his butt about the whole... Someone in the woods thing.  I don’t know.”

They both seemed the notice the cat in the window at the same time, Harry’s eyes going wide and excited as his floated up a few feet in the air.

“Who’s  _ that? _ ” he asked, grinning up at the white persian with her face against the glass.

“That must be Betunia,” Louis grimaced. “Simon’s show cat.”

“She’s  _ beautiful _ ,” Harry said, reaching towards her. “But so sad. Is she alright do you think?”

“I wouldn’t be, if I were her,” Louis frowned. “I don’t think living with Simon would be good for anyone.”

“Huh,” Harry said, deep in thought. 

“C’mon,” Louis said, taking his hand and pulling him back to the ground.

They returned to the woods, walking hand in hand and weaving through trees and branches. Louis could feel the silky dust on Harry’s fingers that seemed to always coat his hands and a bit of his forearms, along with the entirety of his wings. When it got on Louis it looked messy and dirty and ashy but on Harry it was like a fine coating of glitter, sleek and star-like, as if he’d dipped his fingers in a deep black paint and dusted them with shimmer. It was beautiful and otherworldly and magical.

Louis realized he’d been staring at Harry when he suddenly stopped, looking up at a huge redwood that loomed above them.

“Would you like to see my house?”

“Of course I would,” Louis smiled, squeezing his hand.

Harry pulled him forward, circling around the tree to reveal a large hollow at the base, the bark arched to create a person-sized entryway. Harry ducked through first, tugging Louis behind him until they were encased in the tree, the smell of warm wood and dry leaves all around them.

“You live in here?” Louis asked, looking around at the smooth carved walls of the tree.

“Almost,” Harry smiled, looking up. “Can I...?”

He held out his arms expectantly.

“Uh, sure,” Louis said, stepping closer.

Harry wrapped him up tight in his arms and stepped off of the ground. Louis threw his arms around Harry’s neck and clung on tight, watching the sides of the tree fly by as they rose higher and higher. Finally, Harry stepped onto a platform towards the top where the tree started to narrow over their heads.

Louis looked around at the small room, lit by a scattering of glowing candles that flickered and danced as they burned, taking in the piles of shiny rocks and neatly stacked blouses and tattered romance novels.

“Are you a big reader?” Louis smirked, crossing to the stacks of books while Harry folded his nightgown and set it with his other clothes.

“I love books,” Harry told him, smiling brightly.

Louis sat down beside the books and thumbed through a few, grinning to himself when he saw all the big-muscled shirtless men on the covers. Then he crawled over to examine some of Harry’s other collections, finding bottle caps and dried flowers, bauble-covered barrettes, a single vinyl pressing of some Ray Conniff album, a variety of used up nail polishes and lipsticks and empty cosmetic boxes, along with a cheap felt cowboy hat and a pile of slightly rusted jewelry and a small tube of silver glitter.

“I like shiny things,” Harry said in explanation, his cheeks pink.

“I can see,” Louis said, holding up a bit of folded tin foil. “You’re like a crow, with your hord of little treasures.”

“I - ” Harry started, his mouth twitching shyly. “I just like them.”

“That’s alright,” Louis told him with a reassuring smile. “I like them too.”

“And you like my rocks.”

“I love your rocks.”

“And I like you.”

“I like you too,” Louis smiled.

“That’s nice,” Harry said, looking pleased as he settled down on the slightly tattered over-sized pink velvet cushion that seemed to be his bed.

“I think I should be heading back though,” Louis told him, looking out one of the small windows carved in the wood to see the sky lightening outside. “The sun’s coming up. Everyone will be wondering where I am.”

“Of course,” Harry nodded, his face falling. “You’ve gotta go back.”

“Do you think you could take me back down?”

Harry nodded, standing up and taking him in his arms again, fluttering his large moth-like wings and slowly descending back to the ground.

“Will you come back?” he asked, setting Louis back on his feet with so much care it made Louis’ chest feel tight. “When the sun sets again?”

“Of course,” Louis promised, giving his hand a quick squeeze. “I said we could do something fun next time.”

“Yes,” Harry nodded, looking nervous. “Do you think- Cher and Sparkle, they’ve decided to move up their wedding. They’re getting married sooner. Tonight.”

“Are they?” Louis asked, cocking his hip. “How do you know?”

“They told me,” Harry said. “I’m the wedding planner. It’ll take some extra work but I can’t make them wait. They want it to be tonight.”

“Well, it’d just be cruel to make them put it off any longer,” Louis teased. “They’re just so in love. It’d be inhumane.”

“Of course,” Harry nodded. “But. Um, but they also said- They asked me to invite you. To the wedding. They liked you. They want you to come.”

“They did?” Louis asked, feigning shock. “They want  _ me _ to come?”

“Yes,” Harry nodded again. “They said they can’t get married if you aren’t there.”

“Well I guess I’ll have to come,” Louis grinned.

“I hope you will.”

“Nothing could keep me away.”

 

“Does anyone else ever think mothman is... Kinda hot?”

“No?” Zayn squinted, frowning. “Louis? The fuck?”

“Louis,” Liam said, looking concerned. “Are you... Okay?”

Louis’ return to the campsite had gone about how he’d expected. 

He’d come back to find absolutely nobody concerned about him or his whereabouts and when he’d woken them all up it had taken an hour and three cups of coffee for them to stop grumbling long enough for him to tell them about his night. They’d all shut up when they finally heard that he’d been with the creature, had spent the entire night learning about him and observing him.

Liam had been concerned that he’d been brainwashed or beaten and Zayn had still been convinced it was all a dream and Niall hadn’t stopped singing his reprise of “Louis and Mothman Sitting in a Tree (K-I-S-S-I-N-G).”

Louis tried his best to recount the night but kept getting sidetracked trying to describe Harry’s eyes or his lips or the way that his shrieking had started to grow on him.

“I’m fine, Liam,” he grumbled, kicking at a rock on the sidewalk. They were walking to Simon’s house to update him on what they’d found so far.

“Are you sure?” Liam asked, frowning. “You’ve never shown this much... Interest. In any of our subjects in the past.”

“I’m not - ” Louis started, biting his cheek. “I’m not showing  _ interest _ . It’s just. He’s interesting. You haven’t seen him. You wouldn’t understand. He’s- He’s different. He’s not like the other boys I’ve met. He’s sweet.”

“He’s not human,” Liam said, exchanging a look with Zayn. “Like, you know that, right? It’s... A creature.”

“No, yeah,” Louis said, brushing past them to open Simon’s front gate. “Of course. Yeah. But he’s not, like, a monster you know. Can we just. Not tell Simon? Can we leave last night out of it all?”

“Louis - ”

“Sure,” Zayn said, sending Liam a quick look. “We’ll just tell him we’re... Making way.”

“Louis’ sure making way,” Niall smirked.

 

“Thank you for coming,” Simon said when they were ushered into his pristine sitting room, reclined on an overstuffed chair with a porcelain teacup in hand. “I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Yes,” Liam said, awkwardly perching on the edge of a starched cube-like white couch across from him. “Thank you for having us.”

Niall reached across the steel coffee table to offer Simon his hand but was met only with a look of disdain. When he realized his handshake wouldn’t be returned be fell back beside Liam, making himself comfortable even on the sculpture of a couch. Zayn sat gingerly beside them but Louis elected to remain standing behind the couch, looking around at the ridiculously expensive furnishings.

“So how is it going with the creature?” Simon asked, sipping his tea. “Have you captured it yet?”

“Er, not yet,” Liam said, frowning. “We’re... Making way with it.”

“Well you’d better get on it,” he told them, glowering. “It’s been on the loose for far too long. I want it caught.”

“Of course,” Liam nodded, pulling out his notebook. “Would you like to see some of our notes? We’ve been gathering accounts from people in town and doing our best to observe it to try and learn more about - ”

“I only care that it’s caught,” Simon said blandly, swirling his tea in his cup. “I want that thing out of my town, no matter what it takes.”

“We’re working on it,” Liam told him diplomatically. “I think we’re really - ”

“ _ Betunia!! _ ” Simon bellowed suddenly, setting down his tea with a loud clack and stomping to the window where the fluffy white cat was chirping excitedly at some birds outside. “I told you to stay away from the window!”

He scooped her up roughly, holding her tight when she struggled to get down.

“Is that Petunia?” Niall asked, standing up to try and pet her. 

“ _ Buh _ -tunia,” Simon growled, tightening his grip when Betunia reached out for Niall.

 

“Alright,” Niall nodded. He followed as Simon twisted to keep her away from him. “She’s so cute! Look at her little paws! She’s got gray socks on!”

Suddenly Simon’s face went sour.

“Her one flaw,” he scowled down at her. “The cosmetologist in town still refuses to bleach her fur for me. I’ll have to drive somewhere and find someone who will.”

“You want to bleach your cat?” Louis frowned. “Is that allowed?”

“Her feet lower her competition scores,” he said matter-of-factly. “I’ll do what I have to do. It’s for her own good.”

“Right...” Louis said, watching Betunia struggle in Simon’s iron hold.

“I think it would be best for you all to leave,” Simon said cooly, stepping towards the door.

“Of course,” Liam nodded, leading them all back to the front of the house. “Thank you so much for having us. You’ve got a, uh, lovely home.”

“Remember to catch that creature,” Simon said stonily, his nose in the air. “If none of you are competent enough to take care of it there are other methods of disposal.”

“Right,” Louis said, forcing a polite smile to cover up his displeasure. “I’m sure we’ll be done here in no time.”

“I would hope so,” Simon told them, shutting the door behind them with a loud slam.

They stood for a moment in silence, staring at the wooden door, all deep in thought.

“ _ What’s _ his fucking cat’s name?” Niall asked, a look of bewilderment left on his face.

 

That night as Louis walked back towards Harry’s tree he wondered what exactly he was doing. Liam and Zayn had been drilling into him all day that he needed to remain professional, gathering facts like a scientist. He needed to keep his distance, to observe and to take notes, not to get attached. Harry was a subject, something to study, not even  _ human _ , and Louis was a scientist.

All of that flew right out of his head the second that Harry fluttered to the ground, looking like a forest fairy or an angel in the moonlight.

He was wearing the nightgown from the night before, the skirt billowing out around his bare legs and the collar buttoned high with a pink satin bow below his chin. His unruly hair had been pulled up into an unkept bun, half of it escaping in long curly tendrils that caught on the gold tiara-like headband on his head. He had accessorized with a dark blue fanny pack around his waist and a ladybug sticker that he’d pressed to one cheek.

He looked divine, in every sense of the word.

Strange and otherworldly and absolutely fucking superb.

“Do I look okay?” Harry asked, bouncing nervously in his heeled boots.

_ You look beautiful _ , Louis wanted to say.  _ Magnificent. _

“You look great,” he said instead. “I like your ladybug. It’s a nice touch.”

“Thank you,” Harry beamed. “You look nice.”

“Thanks,” Louis grinned, glancing down at the suit jacket he’d borrowed from Liam. Liam was the only one who ever brought anything formal on their trips. “I wasn’t sure what to wear for a cat wedding so I played it safe.”

“It’s good,” Harry said, fidgeting shyly. He unzipped his fanny pack and pulled out a rock, cradling it gently in his hand. “Here. This is for you.”

“For me?” Louis asked, smiling in surprise. “I didn’t know we were exchanging gifts. I’d have brought you something.”

“You gave me stuff last night,” Harry reminded him. “But I wanted you to have this. It’s my nicest rock - the shiniest one.”

“Harry,” Louis said, a hint of reverence bleeding into his voice. He knew how Harry felt about his rocks.

“Nobody else likes my rocks very much,” Harry explained, frowning. “But you like them. So I want you to have this one.”

“Thank you,” Louis told him sincerely, taking the rock in his hand and rubbing his thumb over the smooth surface. “It’s beautiful.”

Harry bit his lip, a pleased flush on his face.

“Shall we?” Louis asked, offering his elbow. 

They walked together to the cat shed, their arms linked and their hips brushing. 

The shed was done up beautifully, old Christmas lights strung up on the roof and bunches of wildflowers tucked everywhere they could be so that the weathered old shed became a magical little fairy house, glowing bright and colorful in the night. 

“It's lovely,” Louis grinned. “Very bridal.”

Harry unlocked the door to reveal more decorations inside, tinfoil hearts and crumpled streamers and newspaper confetti filling up the space along with more lights and flowers. Harry had drug in some mismatched chairs and benches on either side of the petal-covered aisle and created an arch at the end out of an old garden trellis woven with flowers and ornaments to fill in the broken bits.

“You can sit here,” Harry told him, leading him to a cushioned seat near the middle. 

Once Louis was sat Harry spent a moment gathering the rest of the cats and setting them each on their own chair, having to bribe some with food to keep them in place. Once everyone was settled (for the most part - half of the cats were still resisting Harry’s careful planning and the other half were falling asleep) Harry crossed over to a battery-powered boombox and hit play, a staticy, slightly warped version of “I Got You Babe” starting to play.

He dashed to the back of the room, reaching into a small enclosure and pulling out Miss Mercury and Gucci. Mercury was dressed in a frilly pink dress, the sleeves ballooning out around her arms and her head shining with a light dusting of Harry’s glitter. Gucci was dashing in the tiny cat-sized tuxedo that Harry must have spent all day making for her, complete with a little bow tie and a cardboard top hat tied around her head with a ribbon.

Louis watched, delighted, as Harry walked the bridesmaids down the aisle and set them on either side of the trellis before flying back for the brides. He carefully reached in to take one under each arm, shielding them from view for a dramatic reveal.

Louis stood up dutifully, clasping his hands behind his back and letting out the appropriate oohs and aahs when Harry turned around, presenting the brides-to-be to their audience.

Cher was in a beautiful pastry-like dress made from netting and scraps of lace and what looked to be several strings of costume pearls. She had a long trail and a veil that poofed up over her head and that she kept batting at as Harry walked them down the aisle. Sparkle had a more subdued A-line gown with a bejeweled collar and a daisy pinned to her bodice.

Harry set them beneath the trellis on a knee-high platform and clicked off the music, standing behind them and looking like a proud father.

“Please be seated,” he said, sending Louis a quick wink before looking out on the rest of the attendees. “We are gathered here today to join Sparkle and Cher in holy matrimony. These two women - ” he bent at the waist, pulling Sparkle back into place when she started to wander off, not missing a beat in his eulogy “ - love each other deeply and wish to celebrate that love. I have known both of them for a very long time and can safely say that there is no better match for either of them than the other. I have watched their love flourish - ” he bent again, pulling Cher’s veil out of her mouth “ - I have seen them stand together through good times and bad. Through thick and thin I have watched them as they stood strong, confident in their love.”

At his feet Sparkle was laid down with one leg in the air, peacefully grooming herself while Cher wrapped herself around the veil that she’d finally succeeded in pulling off, jackrabbiting her back feet to tear it to shreds. All around him cats were falling asleep and getting into fights and clawing at the chairs while Harry rambled on about love and strength and marriage. Louis didn’t ever want it to end.

“Cher?” he asked, kneeling down and lifting her in his arms. “Do you take Sparkle to be your lawfully wedded wife?”

There was a moment of silence before he leaned over, tucking his mouth behind her shoulder and giving a garbled “I do.”

Louis thought he might explode from fondness, a peal of laughter bubbling out of him.

“And Sparkle,” he said, exchanging Cher for her soon-to-be wife. “Do you take Cher?”

He puppeteered another “I do” and let out a small cheer, taking both cats in his arms and standing up proudly.

“You may now kiss the brides!”

He held them close together and Sparkle gave Cher’s ear a quick nip before Cher batted at her head, letting out a hiss.

Louis stood up, clapping his hands and cheering loudly.

Harry beamed at him, holding up the cats for him to see.

He nudged the boombox with his foot to get the music going again and took them back down the aisle as newlyweds, Louis cheering them on and tossing loose flower petals all the way as Cher’s namesake sang them out.

 

“I think we should leave them to their reception,” Harry told him conspiratorially once all the cats were undressed and back on the ground. “I see they’ve already gotten into the cake.”

He gestured to where five cats were all tearing apart a three layer tuna-based cake on a pink polkadot cake stand in the corner.

“Of course,” Louis grinned, still delighted by the whole event. “We wouldn’t want to cramp their style.”

“Of course not,” Harry said, a small smile breaking through his serious facade. “If you'd care to join me, I've packed a bit of a picnic.”

“That sounds wonderful,” Louis told him, linking their arms once more and following as Harry retrieved a large wicker basket and started off towards some new location. As they walked Louis complimented Harry’s decorations again and asked how long it took him to put it all together.

“Let’s see,” Harry said, pinching his lip as he thought. “I started right after you left - ” he paused to put his hands on Louis’ waist and fly him up over a shoulder-high metal fence, his wings flapping behind him “ - and I finished right before you got back.”

“You didn’t sleep at  _ all? _ ” Louis asked, dragging his feet through overgrown grass, tripping over a few gopher holes.

Harry just shrugged sheepishly.

“Not really? I was too excited, I don’t think I could have if I tried.”

“Well c’mon,” Louis said, taking the basket from where it was looped around Harry’s elbow. “Let’s eat and then you can take a little nap. A _cat_ _nap_ , if you will.”

Harry laughed delightedly and pulled him along to a small tree at the top of a little sloping hill towards the back of the pasture. He pulled an old patchwork quilt from the basket and unfolded it by shaking it out, letting it fall gently onto the grass before he started pulling out food. He laid out a spread of day-old bread and homemade jam and jars of acorns, along with a full sheet cake.

“Where do you get all the cake from?” Louis asked, opening one of the jelly jars filled with water. “It was you who kept covering kids with cake, wasn’t it?”

“You heard about that,” Harry said, his ears going a bit pink. “Well, at the grocery store, they leave food outside sometimes - food that nobody wants. So I take it sometimes, and sometimes there’s cakes.” He unzipped his fanny pack, taking out a banana and an orange before starting to peel the banana. “So one day, when I was feeling sort of lonely and there was a whole pile of cakes stacked next to the trash, I took them all back to the woods and I decorated it all real nice, hung up streamers and some balloons I found - well, the balloons were all rubber gloves but it looked very nice - and I got everything ready and when the bell rang at the school I waited in the trees for the children to come out and when they did I invited them to come to my party and they did, about five of them. So I brought them with me and we made teams and we had a big cake fight and we ran all over and threw cake at each other and it was so  _ fun _ , Louis! We should have a cake fight some time. And then the next day they came back and they brought their friends and soon lots of kids were coming out to have cake fights with me but then all of a sudden they stopped coming.”

He frowned, looking down at his peeled banana sadly.

“I still always keep at least one cake around just in case anyone comes but nobody ever does.”

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Louis said, taking his free hand. “I think their parents started telling them not to come. I know you mean well but the parents- I think they’re just afraid. It sounds a bit dangerous letting their kids run around the woods with someone they don’t know. Does that make sense? They just want to keep their kids safe.”

“But they  _ were _ safe,” Harry huffed. “I just wish I could tell them that but they never listen to me. They always start yelling before I get the chance to say anything. I just wanted to have some cake fights.”

“We’ll have our own cake fights,” Louis promised, squeezing his hand. “We’ll have all the cake fights you want.”

“Thanks,” Harry said, a small smile overtaking his pout. He raised the banana to his mouth, sticking his tongue all the way out to taste it before he bit it, making Louis crinkle his nose fondly.

“So the cake was you, and the cats,” Louis listed as Harry mixed strawberry-kiwi Kool Aid in one of his water jars and sipped it through a straw. “What about the weather thing, with the random water spurts. Was that you as well?”

Harry grinned around his straw and nodded.

“So how does that work then, is it rain? Do you have a squirt gun or some- ”

Harry stood up, his cheeks ballooned out with Kool Aid, and flew a few meters away before leaning back, knees bent and his head just brushing the tallest grass, and shot out a tall misty cloud of liquid twice his height.

“Wha- What? You - ?” Louis sputtered as Harry walked back with a satisfied smirk, picking up his Kool Aide again and taking another sip. “You’re like a whale.”

“Thank you,” Harry grinned. “I’m very good at it.”

“Quite,” Louis agreed. “So you just... Do that? At people?”

“Well, sometimes I like to fly up on top of buildings and do it so it stays in the air longer and sometimes I do it when there’s a hot day and I think someone might like some help cooling down.”

“Right,” Louis nodded. “That’s very thoughtful of you.”

“I like to think so.”

“How about the rats?” Louis asked, leaning back on his elbows. “We found a carpet bag full of dead rats. Was that you?”

“You found my snack bag!” Harry said excitedly. “That’s been missing for  _ ages _ . Do you have it?”

“Er, no,” Louis said, looking alarmed but not surprised. “It was full of dead rats.”

“Those were for the girls,” Harry explained. “Sometimes I like to bring them treats but there isn’t much in the woods to bring them. They like rats though.”

“Right,” Louis nodded, slightly disgusted. “So. Rats.”

“Do you know where my bag is? It’s my favorite.”

“I think it might have gotten thrown out, Love.”

“Poo. I loved that one,” Harry pouted.

“Alright, so what about Old Lady Mabel’s silverware? We still haven’t figured that out. I didn’t see it in your tree, do you have it?”

“Oh, the silverware?” Harry asked, wrinkling his nose. “No, I wouldn’t have taken it. She hasn’t polished it in years, it’s not even shiny anymore. I think that was her nephew, Toby. He always takes things in town but he never leaves  _ any _ rocks for anyone.”

“That scoundrel,” Louis laughed, tearing off a piece of bread and biting into it.

Harry hummed in agreement and laid back, looking up at the stars. Eventually Louis joined him and they stayed like that for a long time, talking about nothing and watching as the moon got higher in the sky.

“What was that?” Louis asked sometime far after midnight when he’d almost fallen asleep.

“Just the horses,” Harry said sleepily, laid out with his nightgown spread around him like a snow angel.

“Horses?” Louis asked, sitting up and peering out into the darkness.

“Yeah,” Harry smiled, floating up into the air and taking Louis’ hand to pull him up.

They moved through the pasture slow and syrupy, weighed down by the early hour as they followed the sounds of neighing and whickering horses.

“There they are,” Harry said when the shadows in the distance started to take physical form, big lumbering shapes looming in the moonlight.

They came closer, finding a whole herd of horses trundling around, some swaying lightly in sleep and some munching on grass. 

“Friends!” Harry exclaimed quietly, reaching out to pet their velvety noses and smooth down their flanks. “I haven’t visited them in  _ days _ , I’ve been so busy with the wedding.”

“I’m sure they’ve missed you,” Louis smiled, jolting when he felt a nose press against his back and start exploring his pockets. “Hey!”

He twisted around, pushing the horse out of his blazer and laughing when it let out a disappointed huff.

“Here you go,” Harry said, pulling a carrot from his fanny pack and breaking it into little pieces. He held one in the flat of his hand and offered it to the nearest horse who munched on it quickly before mouthing up his arm to look for more. Together they distributed out all the carrots and apples that Harry had fit in his fanny pack until every horse who was awake got a treat.

“So where to next?” Louis asked as they bundled up their picnic back on the top of the hill.

“I thought we could go see the big light,” Harry told him, folded his quilt back up.

“The big light?”

“Yes,” Harry grinned. “It’s my favorite place in the world, I think. It’s big and yellow and so bright you can see it from miles away. Sometimes I like to sit and look at it all night.”

“Alright,” Louis said, curious to see Harry’s light. “Maybe next time we can find a lamp store or something. I bet you’d like that, a whole huge room that’s just full of lights.”

“Oh, that sounds magical,” Harry said dreamily.

Louis packed the last of Harry’s jars into his basket and stood up, finding himself almost nose-to-nose with Harry who was hugging the folded quilt to his chest.

“Hey, Louis?”

“Yeah?”

“Is this a date?”

Louis faltered, the easy smile falling from his face.

_ Was _ it a date?

Did he  _ want  _ it to be?

“I - ”

He heard Liam’s voice in his head, ranting about the scientific method and lab rats and interspecies relationships and giant wings and his voice seemed to get lost in his throat.

Harry was looking at him with big hopeful eyes and he had to look away.

It couldn’t be a date. He couldn’t date Harry. He didn’t even know what Harry  _ was, _ but he wasn’t human. He was a cryptid, just like all the other ones they’d been tracking, and before long they’d be in another town researching something else. Liam had been telling him all day not to get invested, not to get too close. He needed to get information and get out, like a spy. He couldn’t date Harry.

He couldn’t even  _ look _ at Harry.

“I’m a human, Harry,” he heard himself saying. “And I’m a scientist. I’m  _ researching _ you. It wouldn’t be... Ethical.”

“Oh,” Harry said, sounding small and sad and  _ wrong _ . Harry wasn’t supposed to sound like that. “Of course. I knew that already, I just- I’ve got to go.”

That wasn’t right.

“I just...” he started, turning back and seeing the dejected look on Harry’s face. He couldn’t find the right words. “If you were human I’d - ”

“Don’t,” Harry said, eyes shining. “Please don’t.”

“Harry...” Louis said, but he was too late.

Harry had gathered up the basket and leapt into the air, disappearing with a flutter of wings and a short mournful shriek.

“Fuck,” Louis muttered, pulling at his hair and kicking the ground. “ _ Fuck! _ ”

 

Louis spent the day wrapped in his sleeping bag, covered in twigs and leaves from his clumsy hike back to the campsite and feeling absolutely horrid. He’d broken Harry’s heart and he knew it, because he’d broken his own as well. He couldn’t stop replaying his last few moments with Harry over and over in his head, the way his voice had broken as he ran away and the look of embarrassment that flashed over his face when Louis reminded him that he wasn’t human. He felt like a monster.

“You know you can’t hide in there forever.”

Louis recognised Niall’s voice in the tent and felt someone sit down on the corner of his sleeping bag.

“Yes I can. I live here now,” Louis said from deep within it, burrowed down like a gopher and clutching the rock Harry had given him.

“It can’t have been  _ that _ bad,” Niall said, laying down next to Louis on the edge of the sleeping bag. “We’ve all been on shit dates. Did he stand you up or something?”

“It wasn’t a date,” Louis grumbled, cuddling up to Niall through the blanket. “Or I  _ thought _ it wasn’t. I told him it wasn’t.”

“Well that’s rude.”

“I ruined everything,” Louis groaned. “He was so sweet, put so much thought into it all, and I told him he was just  _ research _ .”

“Why would you tell him that?” Niall asked, sounding genuinely baffled.

“Because I’m a monster who doesn’t deserve love.”

“Louis,” Niall frowned, pulling back the blanket until Louis’ face was visible, red from being trapped in the stuffy heat of the sleeping bag all day and a little tear-stained. “You fucked up. Everyone does. You need to go apologise to that boy and then take him on a real date.”

“But Liam said-”

“Fuck Liam,” Niall told him emphatically. “He’s full of shit. I love him but he doesn’t have any fucking idea what he’s talking about. Ever. Do you like Harry?”

“I can’t like Harry,” Louis insisted. “He’s not - ”

“Do you _ like _ him?”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded sadly.

“Good. And he likes you?”

“He did,” Louis shrugged. “Before I ruined it.”

“He still does,” Niall promised, petting his head placatingly. “That’s all you need, okay? You like him and he likes you. It doesn’t matter if he’s got wings or that you’re a dickhead. You like each other. That’s all that matters.”

“I broke his heart,” Louis reminded him.

“So say you’re sorry,” Niall said easily. “Hearts get broken. They heal. Life goes on. Hopefully you can be the one to heal his broken heart.”

Louis gave a noncommittal shrug and started to burrow back into his sleeping bag.

“Nope,” Niall said, dragging him out as Louis fought to remain in his cave. “C’mon. There’s a very sad mothman somewhere out there who you need to apologise to.”

“Fine,” Louis grumbled, crawling to his feet and throwing a hoodie over his stained oversized t-shirt.

“Yay,” Niall grinned, kissing his forehead and pointing him out of the tent. “Go get your boy.”

 

Louis was filled with trepidation as he walked towards Harry’s tree house.

He’d been trying to think of what he’d say when he saw him but he kept coming up short. All he knew was that he needed to say sorry and that he needed to tell Harry how he felt about him, even if Louis didn’t quite know what his feelings were. He liked Harry - he liked him a lot. Maybe more than anyone he’d ever met. But he didn’t think he was allowed to like him so much. He wasn’t supposed to feel such a draw towards someone who shouldn’t even exist, but he did and that person was Harry so Louis couldn’t help but feel it. He wanted to buy Harry all the lamps he could find and he wanted to polish every rock in the forest for him and he wanted to help him plan cat weddings for the rest of their lives. He couldn’t help that he felt that way but if Harry felt the same then he didn’t see how it could be wrong.

“Harry?” he called as he approached the tree, peering up into the darkness of the hollowed trunk. The sun had set just moments before and it was already dark and murky in the woods. “Are you there? It’s Louis. I’m sorry.”

There was no response, and he couldn’t see the flickering of the candles that Harry always lit when he was home.

“Harry?” he called again, louder, just in case.

Nothing.

Dejected, wondering if Harry was really not there or if he was just ignoring him, Louis started to walk back to the campsite. Then he heard the shouting in the distance.

He changed direction, following the sounds of angry yelling towards the town, seeing torches flickering between the trees and houses.

“What’s going on?” he asked as he burst into the town square, finding a mob of people holding lit torches and improvised weapons.

“We’re gonna run that thing out of town once and for all,” a man holding a gardening trowel said, shaking his torch so that the flame danced wildly.

“What?” Louis frowned. He looked around frantically for anyone that he knew, running to Sgt. Teasdale when he saw her across the square. “Sergeant! What’s happening? Why is everyone going after Har- The creature?”

“Oh, Louis,” she said, sending off the group she’d been instructing. “I’m sorry, I know you boys were looking forward to catching it yourselves but Mr. Cowell decided he couldn’t wait any longer. He assembled everyone today and made the plans, we’re all going to try and corner the creature and get it out of town once and for all.”

“Wh-what? Why?”

“It’s Betunia,” Teasdale winced. “She was taken by the creature early this morning, just before dawn. It was the last straw when it ate her. Simon was so distraught, I think this is the only thing that could bring him peace.”

“But he- It doesn’t- !” Louis sputtered, looking around at the crowd who had started to break off into smaller groups that were heading off to find Harry.

“Thank you so much for all your help,” she said, smiling warmly. “Tell the other boys for me, won’t you? You’ve all helped us so much, I’m sorry you didn’t get a chance to catch it.”

She went off to take the next group out, weapons drawn.

Louis started to panic. He needed to get to Harry before everyone else, he needed to warn him. He started to run, not sure where he was going but knowing that he had to find Harry. If he truly hadn’t been home then he could be anywhere, any one of the places he’d shown Louis. He might have gone back to the street light or his cat shed or he could be wandering through the neighborhoods, completely unsuspecting of the angry mob coming his way.

Then he remembered the light, Harry’s big light that he’d said was his favorite place. He could picture Harry, lonely and dejected, looking for comfort in the form of a big fluffy cat and his favorite light source.

Harry hadn’t taken him there and he didn’t know where it was but it was his only hope, his best bet of where Harry might be.

He looked around as he ran, searching for anything that Harry might constitute as a big light, passing by neon signs and street lamps and porch lights, looking for anything big and bright. Then he saw it, in the distance, lighting up the night like a beacon of hope.

The local McDonalds, the huge  _ ‘M’ _ lit up like a lighthouse.

The second of relief he felt when he saw it froze up inside him like an icicle when he noticed the crowd of angry townspeople gathered in the parking lot, thrusting their weapons up towards the roof.

Louis sprinted forward, pushing through the crowd and clawing desperately towards the front of the crowd. All around him people were yelling and shouting, jeering up at Harry who had been caught under a net at the edge of the roof, just out of reach.

“Harry!” he shouted, reaching out towards him.

“Louis?” Harry said, looking down at him fearfully. “I’m stuck! I can’t get out!”

“Don’t worry,” Louis told him, trying to look sure. “You’ll be okay. I’ll get you out. Harry, I’m so sorry, I - ”

“Ah, Mr. Tomlinson,” he heard from behind him, turning to find Simon standing with a gleaming pitchfork that he must have bought just for the occasion. “I’m so glad you can all be here.”

Louis noticed Niall and Liam and Zayn standing behind Simon, all looking as worried as he felt.

“Simon, you need to let him go,” Louis pleaded. “He’s innocent, I swear! He hasn’t been doing any of the things you’ve all been accusing him of.”

“Oh?” Simon sneered. “Then where is my precious Betunia?”

Just then they heard a high-pitched meow from overhead.

They looked up to find the fluffy white cat caught in the net with Harry, nestled safely in his arms.

“Betunia!” Simon cried, reaching out his hand.

“She’s alright,” Harry called down, stroking her ears. “I made sure to cover her up when I saw the net so she wouldn’t get hurt.”

“See?” Louis said, climbing onto the hood of a nearby car to get over the crowd and closer to Harry. “He didn’t hurt her. He kept her safe.”

“He probably just wanted her in one piece to eat her,” Simon scoffed, causing an outraged murmur to travel through the mob.

“He hasn’t been eating any of the cats at all!” Louis cried. “They’re all safe out in the woods. He was just giving them a home when they didn’t like the ones they had.”

Everyone gasped, shocked.

“You mean Muffy’s alive?” one man called, looking a bit teary-eyed.

“And Spot?”

“And Delilah?”

“And Rufus?”

“Yes,” Louis told them. “All of your cats are fine. I’ve seen them myself.”

“What about the children?” someone yelled. “It’s been taking our children!”

“He brought them back though?” Louis reminded them, wincing a bit. “I mean, yeah, he probably shouldn’t have taken the kids without your permission but he didn’t know any better! He just wanted to give them some fun! And he’s sorry he didn’t ask first. Right, Harry?”

“Um, yes,” Harry nodded from under the net. “I’m sorry. I’ll ask first next time. I can get some, er, permission slips?”

“See?” Louis asked the crowd. “He didn’t mean any harm.”

“What about my clothes?” Mrs. Peters asked, shaking her fist. “I’ve lost half my wardrobe!”

“Oh,” Louis winced. “So there’s been some confusion I’m afraid. Harry here thought he’d been buying the clothes from you. He’s been leaving you rocks as payment - beautiful, lovely rocks.  _ Great _ rocks. But, um, maybe he could pay you back with real money? Would that be okay?”

“He owes me a lot,” she huffed, crossing her arms.

“Harry?” Louis looked up at him expectantly.

“Fine,” Harry agreed sulkily. “But she has to give my rocks back. She didn’t even like them.”

“Alright, who’s next?” Louis asked, looking around at the crowd.

“Is he gonna stop perving on us?” Jade asked, breaking through the crowd with Perrie’s hand in hers. Louis looked up to Harry to answer.

“Sorry,” he told them. “I wasn’t trying to watch you, I promise. I just saw you out in the woods alone and I wanted to make sure you were okay. Also I saw when you went on your first date at Corden’s and I was really happy for you that you got together.”

“Aww,” Perrie said, her expression going mushy. “Remember our first date, Babe?”

Soon they were wrapped around each other, kissing in the middle of the crowd.

“What about my silverware?”

The crowd parted to reveal a hobling old woman who could be no other than Old Lady Mabel.

“That was your nephew, Toby!” Louis exclaimed, throwing up his hands. “Look, there’s been a lot of misunderstandings and he’s really sorry about all the stuff he  _ did _ do but he hasn’t done half of what he’s been accused of. If he promises not to stand in the middle of the street so much and to pay for things using actual legal currency and he gives all your cats back will you all stop yelling at him and threatening him?”

There was a lot of grumbling all through the crowd but they all seemed to be nodding in a tentative agreement.

“Alright, Harry do you think you can agree to that?”

Harry was frowning, clutching Betunia close to his chest.

“I can’t, Lou.”

There was a gasp all through the crowd and Louis frowned up at him.

“Why not, Harry?”

“I can’t give her back,” Harry said, shaking his head adamantly. “The rest can do as they please, but I can’t give Dusty back. It’s not - ”

“ _ Dusty?! _ ” Simon screamed shrilly. “ _ DUSTY?!” _

“Yes,” Harry told him, smiling down at the cat in his arms. “She’s got the cutest little paws, like she’s been playing in the dirt.”

Simon went red, opening his mouth wide to let out an ungodly screech of outrage.

“She is a  _ show cat _ ,” he bellowed, clawing at the wall below Harry. “She’s a  _ purebred! _ ”

“And she’s got dusty little paws.”

The crowd looked on in shock as Simon tried in vain to get to Harry.

“Simon,” Sgt. Teasdale said, looking horrified by his display. “I think you need to calm down.”

She pulled him away from the wall, restraining him even as he continued his violent attempts to scale the building and attack Harry.

“Okay, so I think we can all agree that Simon should never be given ownership of a cat. He mentioned bleaching her the other day and that seems illegal. Inhumane at least. Harry’s a very good cat owner from what I’ve seen. Do you think we can agree to let him adopt Dusty- er, Betunia?” Louis looked to Sgt. Teasdale who thought it over for a moment before nodding. “Okay, are we good here?” he asked, looking out on the crowd. “I know we’ve all gotten off on a rather odd foot and I know he’s not human but that’s Harry and I think he might be my boyfriend and I’d really like to go on another date with him.”

“Another?” Harry asked, peering out shyly from between the ropes of his net.

“Yes,” Louis nodded, stretching out his arm to touch the cinderblock wall of the restaurant so he could lean in closer, still balanced on top of the car. “I’m sorry I said it wasn’t a date. It  _ was _ . I was just being stupid. I was overthinking everything and I didn’t even know how I felt, really, but I do now. Mostly. I’m still confused. But I know I like you, and I hope you still like me too. I hope you can forgive me, Harry.”

“Of course I do,” Harry told him, a tentative smile growing on his face. “I like you a lot, Louis.”

“Tell him you love him!” came a familiar voice in the crowd.

“Niall,” Louis scolded, twisting to shoot him a quick glare. “We’ve been on one date.”

“And?” Niall shrugged below him. “He’s got wings. Why would you draw the line at a premature love confession?”

“Fine,” Louis shrugged, turning back to the crowd as a whole. “This is my boyfriend Harry, I met him in the woods and I love him.”

“EEEEEUUUUCCHHHHAAAHHHHGGGG!!!” Harry shrieked above him happily.

“C’mon, Love, let’s get you down.”

The townspeople helped him cut through the net holding Harry to the roof, bringing in ladders to help Louis get up and steadying him as he climbed back down, a slightly shaken Harry with a renamed cat in his arms following behind him.

Once they were all back on the ground Harry lept into Louis’ arms, wrapping himself around him and kissing him fiercely. The crowd around them cheered, a bit hesitantly, and Harry slipped him probably more tongue than was appropriate for the situation, but Louis assumed it was his first kiss so he didn’t blame him. He just kissed him back, settling his arms around Harry’s waist and feeling his wings fluttering happily as they kissed under the huge yellow arches of McDonalds.

 

The citizens grew to accept Harry as a part of their town as he slowly became one of their own. Beth who ran the local animal shelter hired him on the spot to look after their cats and find them good homes and before long he’d earned enough to pay back all the money he owed for the things he’d accidentally stolen. The PTA impeached Simon and when they needed to fill the position Harry volunteered and was sworn in. His first official order of business was a school-wide cake fight with all the students and teachers armed with hundreds of cakes and pastries. The people even embraced him as a sort of a mascot for the town, their very own cryptid, which attracted a tourist boom of amater cryptozoologists. Louis started his own cryptozoology museum on the edge of the woods where they kept the artifacts that the Spooky Boyz brought back for him from their travels. The townspeople eventually erected a statue of Harry in the town square, wings spread and eyes glowing green.

“They made the ass too big,” Louis told him when they unveiled it, pulling Harry even tighter against his side and kissing his cheek. Harry was wearing some sort of pseudo mariachi suit for the occasion that he’d gotten from god knows where and Louis couldn’t help but think how in love with him he was.

“No,” Harry shook his head, eyes shining with joy. “It’s perfect.”

As children climbed on the statue and swung from the arms and Dusty meowed at their feet Louis wound his arms around Harry’s waist, pulling him in for a kiss and wondering if maybe the real cryptid all along had been the love he found while searching for one.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this weird terrible fic, hopefully you enjoyed some part of it <3 <3 <3  
> [Tumblr](http://lesbianiconharrystyles.tumblr.com/)


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